Dear Tia, A friend of Mine and I like the Same Gentleman

Dear Tia, A friend of Mine and I like the Same Gentleman

Dear Tia Maria Sue,


I feel a little embarrassed to ask you for advice on this. As a grown woman in my 60’s I feel a bit childish… but here it goes. As I am sure you may have noticed that the female population in the Expat community in San Miguel far outweighs the male population. Therefore competition can be stiff! I mean it’s like a Sadie Hawkins Dance back at Snellville Jr High all over! But here is my problem on which I need your sage advice. It seems a dear friend of mine and I have both taken a shine to the same gentleman. What do I do?


Also- would you mind sharing what your favorite cocktail is?


Sadie Hawkins


Dear Sadie,


My, this does sound like a Jr High problem, but without the acne (but with age spots instead). Tia Maria Sue has several thoughts on this subject and several questions. I would like to know if the gentleman has expressed interest in both of you or is he unaware that he is being stalked? If he has expressed interest in both of you knowing you are friends, then he isn’t worth your time. The gentleman really isn’t a gentleman at all then.


But if he is unaware, then you and your friend should sit down and discuss this like the mature individuals I know are. Losing a friendship over a romantic possibility isn’t worth it in my opinion, if you really are good friends then you will wish all the best and happiness for the other with no jealousy. Somehow you must decide that only one of you will pursue the prey, I mean gentleman. Maybe a coin toss? Our friendships are so important and often outlast our romantic liaisons… I would hate for you to lose a close friend over a man and I am sure she would hate to lose you.


Now if I have overestimated your devotion to this friend, then the other option is to get yourself a new pushup bra, pop a breath mint and knock her out of the way. (I’m sorry dear, that might be the martini talking.)


And yes I am so happy to tell you my favorite cocktail…. It’s the next one…. (and hopefully a dry vodka martini )


I’m not judging, I’m just saying.